


Realize

by Coppersmith



Category: Original Work
Genre: Angst, Other, Poetry, Prose Poem
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:42:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27718361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Coppersmith/pseuds/Coppersmith
Summary: Simply a poem, a rant, and an allowance for angst.
Kudos: 1





	Realize

Do you think,  
When you are older,

Wiser,

That you will feel sorrow?

Pain for the actions,  
Pain for the lies,

Pain for all that which you inflicted?

I know what you did,  
I know why you did it,  
I do not care.

You,  
You in your negligence.  
You.  
In.  
Your.  
Hate.

You have harmed me,  
You have broken me,  
And you didn't even care.

You still don't.

I spent,  
So very.

Very.

Long.

Trying to be the child you wanted,  
Trying to be good.  
I tried.  
I failed.

And you hated me for it.

My actions,  
My pain,  
My attempts to please you.  
My attempts to be the adult.  
All for nothing.

I.  
Spent.  
Years.

Years.

Years,  
Trying  
And  
Failing

Over.  
And.  
Over.

To please you,  
To help you,  
To make you happy.

Was it a game to you?

Let's watch her!  
Let's watch her fail.  
Let's watch her cry.  
Let's watch her wish she died.

That's all you ever did.

Watch.

No,  
No I lie.

You watched,  
And you screamed,  
And you broke me.

The pain from your inaction,  
The pain from your actions,  
The pain from the words you spoke.

The things you still do.  
You still say.  
You still.  
Still.  
Hurt me.

And I know,  
I,  
Know.  
You're doing it out of spite.  
I see the gleam in your eyes,  
The ones I share with you,  
The ones you gave me.

And don't think,  
Not for a moment.  
I don't wish,  
It was all we shared.

That we share blood,  
That we share anything.  
Is too much.  
Far.  
Too.  
Much.

But no,  
It would be too much,  
Too much.  
To ask for you to be nothing,  
Nothing but a stranger,  
Nothing but a nightmare,  
Nothing but that which you are.

You shame me.  
You continue to shame me,  
I don't think you'll ever stop.

The pain I lived in,  
Live in.  
That pain is why I am forgetful.  
My brain can't take it.  
I can't remember anything,  
Nothing from the last 9 years.  
Almost nothing from the last 19.

Do you know why?  
Do you?

It's because of you,  
Because of what you did.  
And continue to do.

I fucking hate you.  
I loathe you.  
Every goddamn minute,  
Every single second,  
That I must spend near you,  
With you,  
Around you.

Every single one.  
Causes me pain,  
Agony.

Neverending.  
Ceaseless.  
Careless.  
Agony.

But why would you care?  
You haven't even realized.


End file.
